Hello from England!
It’s that time of year again; can you believe it?
We all sit in front of our TVs, often with a drink in hand, to enjoy the most multicultural night of the year. The Eurovision Song Content.
Okay, so the United Kingdom isn’t exactly favourite to win, and it’s probably even less likely that Leicester City winning the Premier League.
Just remember that it’s the taking part which matters… Something I heard a lot as a slightly overweight teenager who came last in every sporting activity at school… I was always put in goal, then moaned at when the other team scored a goal… What didn’t they get about the fact I wasn’t good at sport?
Anyway, I am good at watching telly. And this weekend of May is the second most anticipated (my birthday weekend being the most).
I love it. I love the novelty. I love the innuendo. I love the awful, awful jokes. And I loved Sir Terry Wogan’s commentary.
Of course, Graham Norton has done it the past few years, and he does a good job of filling those big Irish shoes. But there was only one Wogan.
So as you’re watching it this year, just think of the slightly-racist slurs Sir Terry will be making in Heaven.
And now you can also drown your sorrows with the help of my Eurovision Drinking Game. I promise you, you’ll be completely bladdered by the end of the first song. And you’ll need to be if you want to actually make it to the end of the results with your sanity still intact.
Let’s hope for plenty of bad dancing, irregular pitching, befuddling lyrics, scantily-clad women, and a winning song you’ll never hear again. Oh, and an entourage of hosts who have as much chemistry as mixing water with water.
Don’t forget to share this with everyone else so they can have as much fun as you. And share with me on Twitter the messy results @MrStuy.